Say Cheese

Who doesn't enjoy looking at pictures, especially those of the awkward kind? Well, there's a website that has exactly what you're looking for.
http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/

Here's a little sample of what you'll find... Let's just say the guy in this picture is "spot on".

Crash

Let's be honest... wipeouts are funny! This tumble by Frenchman Michael Llodra at Wimbledon is no exception. He plows into the umpire chair, a trash can, and ball girl all in one shot. This poor girl gets pummeled...



A few games later Llodra had to stop playing because of an abdominal injury. His opponent, Tommy Haas, took a few minutes to rally with one of the other ball girls... which I think is a cool gesture.

Real man of Genius

I wanted to expand for a second on a previous post. Better yet, let's just hear it straight from the man himself...



I don't know what the hell he's talking about, but oddly it kind of makes sense.



Same classic Buseyisms:

FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real
TEAM = Together, Everyone Achieves More
DOUBT = Debating on Understanding Bewildering Thoughts
SOBER = Son Of a Bitch! Everything's Real
ROMANCE = Relying On Magnificent And Necessary Compatible Energy

The Jukebox

Here's a band that I don't really know what to make of. For starters, the band name is horrible. They've had a bunch of hits... some I liked and some I didn't. I've had this one stuck in my head for the last 3 days...

Won't Go Home Without You
Maroon 5


VH1 TV Shows Music Videos Celebrity Photos News & Gossip

Nice bonus version with Sara Evans:



I'm thinking Sara Evans and Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine may have made some music together off stage as well.

A True Visionary

Meet the next great entrepreneur... Toby Jones. I'm not just a fan because he shares the same name as my first cat... Tobias. This big cat is a marketing genius. Just watch a couple commercial spots for his first business...





But like every great businessman, Toby understands the importance of pursuing new ventures.




When opportunity knocks Toby Jones answers.

Good... Bad... It's all the same...

Can something be completely awful and awesome at the same time? Oh yes it can... and I found what it is... the movie Point Break. I was watching this movie the other day and realized just how terrible it was. But I couldn't stop watching.

The awful:
Keanu Reeves is nothing short of terrible.

The awesome!

Gary Busey is magic. *** More on this later ***

I leave you with these words of wisedom... also know as a Buseyism:

"Fear is the dark room where the Devil develops his negatives."
"When you get lost in imaginatory vagueness, your foresight will become a nimble vagrant."
"Your imagination is the hood ornament on the car of creativity."
"Nothing changes like changes, because nothing changes but the changes."
"Drinking your own blood is the paradigm of recycling."

Amazing

You just have to watch...

Alternative Medicine

Now here's a doctor who takes a slightly different approach to health and nutrition... one worth looking at more closely. Hard to argue with any of these points. Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat,your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain... Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ..... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle,it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

AND.....

For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.
1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

Man Magnet

I must confess... someone has a crush... a man crush... and it's me. This man is everything I'm not. He's tall, dark, handsome, and millionaire. About the only thing we share in common is being left-handed. Most readers (all three of you) will probably have no idea who he is. As a huge fan of the sport played by this finely tuned athlete, I've developed an unhealthy admiration for this cat. Folks, meet Spanish tennis star Fernando Verdasco...





Sadly, I've even fashioned my hair into a faux hawk... thankfully this stayed within the confines of my own home. I looked ridiculous.







Now I must run off to do some guy things so I can right the ship again. This post has me feeling awkward.

Been a While

After an extended hiatus I'm back... I'm back like a butt crack (being back like cooked crack was already taken). So what have I been doing all this time, you ask? Well, apparently I was living under a rock for the past few years because I just discovered the Deadliest Catch. I've developed an unhealthy obsession with this program actually. One of the many things I've learned watching this show is you have to be out of your mind to head out crab fishing on the Bering Sea. These fishermen give new meaning to being a crazy son of a bitch.

My favorite boat... The Northwestern, owned by captain Sig Hansen... who may or may not have the balls of an angry bull. Anyone named Sig is man amonst men. Now I understand these guys make big time money during the crab fishing season. But, you could not pay me enough money to even walk on the deck during a ferocious storm on the Bering, let alone stand by the side of the boat hauling in fishing pots. I wouldn't be catching pots of crabs... but more like a case of the craps... if you know what I mean.

I highly recommend this program for your viewing pleasure.